Last night wind rattled the blinds covering wide open windows, and then the sky lit and the thunder clapped and by gosh if we didnít have an old- fashioned midwestern storm. However, it didnít last long, not even waiting for me to fall asleep. This morning the air is damp and much cooler, but I still have plans to move Helen outside for a spell, as was suggested by her visiting physical therapist.

I have been pretty darn helpful, if I donít say so myself. So far I have helped my father fix the driverís side window on my truck and Iíve helped him change the front brake pads. I had to change the oil myself as my creaky body creaks less than his in the slide-under-the-truck way.

Last night, armed with a box of Chicken Thyme Soup and directions from Diane, I proceeded to create this healthy and way-hearty soup Diane made here on our last visit. I started with one pot, began adding what the recipe called for, plus what Diane suggested I toss in – more chicken and more vegetables – but ran out of room. I grabbed a bigger pot, poured everything into it from the smaller one, added more of what I had cutup, but ran out of room again. If there were a bigger pot, Iída grabbed it, but there was not. For dinner we had delicious Chicken Thyme Stew, and afterwards Tupperwared about a weekís worth. That is, if we have it every day.

I do miss Diane.

---

Yesterday

Helen leads off:

ìMy grandmother hung on so long because she was afraid to die. She was in the nursing home for ten years and the gals there knew her very well. Anyone else wouldnít have lasted so long, but they said she was afraid to go. Thatís the thing with Joan, she thinks I can move in with her; she doesnít know how much is involved. My fatherís sister had pernicious anemia, and his father died in our house. I know what itís like to care for people, Joan doesnít.î

ìHere is the way I see it. Joan doesnít have a thing to worry about because I donít see you hanging around.î

ìNeither do I.î

ìIt is so obvious. Youíre just waiting for the opportunity to see what is next. You get this cold or whatever it was and itís check out time. Your not eating is the same as packing your luggage.î

We are both laughing pretty hard at this. Helen thinks Iím funny or finds my laugher infectious, or she is laughing along with me and plotting ways to cut me out of her will. Could be any of the above.

ìThis is why Iíve put you in charge of me at the end.î

ìIím your health care proxy?í

ìYes. I know youíve worked with dying people before and I know you … .î

ìYou mean you sat down and thought which one of my kids do I want to consign a lifetime of torment to? ëGee, I really thought she was dead, but now that I said pull the plug, I do remember a twitch..oh, dear god, I killed my mother!í

**************
Today

It is only noon and already we have had a full day. The cable guy installed broadband, the visiting nurse popped in to give Helen a quick checkup, and I called a plumber to fix the clogged sink drain. We are having lunch, right before departing to visit the dentist to have Helenís crown re-glued.

HO. ìMy blood pressure is good today.î

Mack. ìGood for what?î

Me. ìGood to keep her alive another day.î

HO. ì I wonít be joining Terri Schiavo today.î

Me. ìIf my prayers are answered youíll die the same day as Paul Wolfowitz, and youíll ride his soul for all eternity.î

HO. ìWho?î

ìWolfowitz. Or Cheney or Pearl or Bush or Powell. Pick anyone of them. If you donít go on the same day you might never find them.î

ìOooo, Iíd love that. Iíd ride ëem.î

---