Update
Michael,Â
You’ve asked me for an update on my new life. I am only too happy to share. You have all shared so much I feel a kinship with you.
The house is sold and as of 12-22 (yes, three days before Christmas) we are residents of Boxborough. We have a renovated 3 bedroom apartment in an old farm house that feels very much like our old house. Roomy and abutting conservation land, we have plenty of birds and wildlife as before. We’ve traded the noise of Rt 2 for a much quieter Rt 111 and are all very thankful. The walls are painted warm and rich from the sterile white template landlords insist on, and the pictures are hung. The floors are christened from the many teenage gatherings that happened over the Christmas break. It felt like “ours” in a very short time. Everyone who see it says it feels just like our old house, even though the colors are all different. I guess it’s true what they say; “Home is where the heart is.”
The girls were phenomenal during the last couple of months. They approached the changes with hesitation and concern, but ultimately accepted the situation and demonstrated once again how mature they are. Both gave it their all physically and emotionally and I couldn’t be more proud. They never cease to amaze me with their flexibility. They are my heroes.Â
New challenges are upon me now. I’ve always been in reactionary roles. A situation arises – I respond accordingly. I find myself needing to actually “create proactively” now. It’s wonderfully scary. Hilary and Hannah are self sufficient which leaves me with lots of time to myself. I went from 100 to 20mph in a very short time. Now I have to find out what I like to do; what
This picture (which I hope I uploaded correctly) hits the nail on the head for me. The stress of the marriage is over. The chaos of moving is over. The holiday frenzy is over. There is a brilliant, inviting light beckoning just beyond a few obstacles left in the way. Even if those obstacles are never passed, the view is spectacular from where I stand. As I sit here smiling at this expressive picture, I feel calm with just a little giggle of excited anticipation in my chest. I’m in a happy, quiet place right now and it feels like dawn all day long. Â
Jen
Sorry. I’m a novice. The picture didn’t post and my etire doc wasn’t included, but you get the gist. Happy, moving on, enjoying life.
Jen
Comment by Jen — February 15, 2007 @ 5:53 pm
Jen, I know nothing about your old life, but this new one, as you have described it, sounds lovely and inviting. “like dawn all day long”-I love that line. Enjoy embracing your new colors.
Comment by LaRad — February 15, 2007 @ 6:10 pm
I was afraid you were ignoring me, Jen, but now I need the rest of that sentence with the semicolon. If you send it to me @ michael at vanishingreality.com, I’ll post it.
After you upload the photo you need to click on it and choose Linked To Image and Send to Editor. It’ll get placed wherever your cursor is in the story you’re submitting.
Nice summary…kinda what I was hoping for, but couldn’t get to. I saw you moving from that neat tucked-away house with the pool and the funny door into the master bedroom, to the ghetto, and your girls dropping out of school to sell crocheted socks on the street corner.
Very nicely written.
Comment by michael — February 15, 2007 @ 7:56 pm
What an incredible photo and description of it!
Now, did you MEAN to make all married folks jealous? Seriously, it does sound … really nice. Good for you.
Comment by Jennifer — February 15, 2007 @ 8:08 pm
My lawyer and I are in process of drawing up the appropriate papers… .
Comment by michael — February 15, 2007 @ 8:24 pm
Thanks guys. It is exciting.
I went through a little blue period once all the dust settled. I honestly didn’t know what to do with myself once all of my lists and lists of to do’s were completed. I went from having many titles (wife, mother, stepmother, daughter-in-law) with huge responsibilities to just having to take care of and entertain myself. This divorce just happened to coincide with Hilary taking off for college and Hannah getting her license.
I am slowly finding out who I am and what the next highest expression of myself is. Jeez, that sounds corny but I cant think of a better way to put it. For the first time I actually have to proactively define myself as opposed to being led in directions by current circumstances. Kinda like when you graduate from college and your whole world is a blank canvas. It’s almost too big. No one is pushing you or leading you through the system anymore. It’s all you.
Give me a document and I can edit to perfection. Ask me to create said document and you will get lots of false starts and holes in the paper from eraser marks. Still, it’s exciting to know that those holes are “me” trying to express myself.
Comment by Jen — February 16, 2007 @ 10:17 am
When you’re blue wear red.
Comment by Chris — February 16, 2007 @ 1:01 pm
You go mom: I am woman hear me roar!
I don’t think I’ll be dropping out of school to sell crocheted socks on the street corner anytime soon, despite that fact that I am painfully realizing the definition of “broke college student” more than I thought I ever would. I know, I know, I should get a job. But…eh.
Comment by Hil K — February 16, 2007 @ 4:31 pm
Or set-up a an account where all the bloggers can send money. That’s much better than working.
Comment by michael — February 16, 2007 @ 5:16 pm
Jen, you paint a vibrant portrait of yourself at this passage, the photo a perfect evocation, and that you throw that all up there, new life after the blog’s recent dalliance with death, is a gift in and of itself. To us all. A whole other kind of giggle, which is a great segueway. Perfectly groovy.
Comment by el Kib — February 16, 2007 @ 10:04 pm
Wonderful, evocative picture!
Comment by rakkity — February 16, 2007 @ 10:44 pm