MaineCourse

My Week With Leon

Chris Rad

Leon finished up the boys room today.  It looks really great.  He did a few “extras” for me.  He decided that the sconce that was in there was not up to par, so he went out and bought and installed a very nice one.  He changed all the switch plates.  He took the piece of wood off from in front of the closet to find that the carpet stopped short of the wood.  So he took the piece of wood home, cut it in half, painted it and reinstalled it.  He took care of the springs in the light fixture..you don’t have to bother.  The two whites he chose for the room look great.  So other than hearing that my boys have too much “junk” it was all good.

Other “extras”:  I couldn’t decide what the hell to do with the dining room, paint or paper.  I had decided on paint, but I could tell Mark wasn’t crazy about the idea (he was quite content with what was there).  So Leon said to me this morning, I have some paper at home left over from a job, let me go get it, see if you like it.  He brought me two different kinds.  One I loved so much I decided to have him put it in my bedroom (not sure how I’m going to tell Mark that one).  The other isn’t something I would have picked out, but it was such a beautiful paper I couldn’t pass it up.  That will go above the chair rail, and a light cranberry paint will go on the bottom of the wall.  He is GIVING me 5 double rolls for both of the rooms.  He called the place he buys his wallpaper from so he could let me know just exactly the bargain I was getting.  It would have cost $112 per double roll.  I feel like Christmas came early.  

Then, in typical Leon fashion, he cannot sit still.  Imagine my surprise when I went upstairs, and there was Leon bleaching my bathroom ceiling!  “You gut mold, I’m getting rid of it for you”.  Okay.  He also attempted to tighten my kitchen faucet, but apparently only a plumber has the proper wrench (or perhaps you?).

I thanked him profusely for the wallpaper.  He said he wouldn’t give it “to nobody else.  You’re a nice lady, I’ll give it to you”.

The nice lady knows a good deal when she sees it.  The cost to paper the two rooms is what it would have cost me to have him do the faux painting in the dining room.

What one has to endure with Leon are conversations such as the following:

Leon:  I did work for a couple of fags on Union Ave
Me:  Leon, that’s offensive, don’t say that.
Leon:  You know, men who act like women
Me:  Leon, I knew what you meant.  Fag is degrading, please don’t use that word.

5 minutes later:

Leon:  My son Joe, what a sweet kid, everyone loves him, his teachers can’t get over how polite my son is.
Me:  That’s a nice thing Leon.
Leon:  I hope he’s not a fag.

So real, I could hear it. Great little story so now thanks to you, Nice Lady, I know him, too.

Posted by Helen.

Dear Chris,
Funny story, and such a nice follow-up to Michael's. We're wondering if you would mind moving in with us so that you and Michael would have an endless plentitude of stories to write in tandem.
It would also facilitate Caroline's meeting Joe.
Di

Posted by otherauthor'swife.

My sentiments exactly, o.a.w. -- you two authors write well together serially. Good play in part two off the rhythm & style of part one, and a zinger of an ending.

How do such "nice", erudite people meet such throwback men, and then interact with them such that they find their unique humanity, and so non-judgmentally? Aah, the rich life lessons of The Blog...........

Posted by land of leon.

'Tis easy to be non-judgemental when there's free wallpaper involved. He's just one of those rough around the edges but warm inside kind of person. One time I was dropping my son off for practice at the school that, unbeknownst to me, is across the street from Leon's house. He was outside raking and he noticed me in my car. As loud as possible he yells "Chris...is that you...come in the house my wife's not home".

Posted by nicelady.

The simple truth is (as seen by yours truly) , these vignettes of Noland, and Leon, and John V, and Dolly Smith, and whomever, are such distortions of who they really are. I agree with Chris's rough edges, warm inside, comment, but I also think, without those edges, who would he be? If I needed a painter, I'd hire Leon.

Think of Leon, think of John V, the electrician. But different edges. Don't compare Leon to Noland. And chew on this, of all that you know of Noland - I really do like the guy.

Posted by michael.

I can tell you do -- both of you. And it's your liking them that most challenges my reflexes and encourages me to use other parts of my being than my intellect.

Posted by edified.

Dear edified, what a great comment. To be tolerant of people who to others may seem downright intolerable does indeed require other parts than ones intellect. I just love your choice of words. The next time someone tells me not to get my hopes up with the Red Sox and I want to sock them one, I'll remember that they must have something about them that appeals to someone. Go Sox.

Posted by nicelady.

Agree with Land-of-Leon -- an excellent two-pronged ditty on the nether-world of blue-collar, salt-of-the-earth types.

I am reminded of:

- Vit, the swearing Irish Somerville mechanic that fixed Diane's 1959 Buick back when
- Danny, the ace Jamaican exhaust pipe welder for a song, at the Cambridge garage, to which I would never send my daughter's unaccompanied

Posted by dittoer.

Call me intolerant; call me anything you want. But, truth to tell, I just can't summon any warm fuzzies for the bigot or the wife beater, no matter their other fine qualities.

Posted by Lacking.

Chris, maybe Lacking would feel differently if one of us told the story about Leon's dad's reaction to the store bought Spaghetti sauce.

Posted by michael.

Leon had what to us seemed like an abusive father(based on one story...apparently the home made spaghetti his mother made, for her family of 8, was not cooked properly that night and the pot was thrown across the room by the father..details are sketchy but that's the crux of it), but he speaks of his father so glowingly, carries his picture in his wallet, he seems to just see it as part of who his father was. He also endured a lot of school yard taunting as an immigrant italian, very short, spoke no english, wore home made clothes, etc, etc. But Lacking is right...I hear the Noland stories and think what a jerk even though I know if Michael likes him there must be some good in there.

Posted by nicelady.

My heart breaks a little every time I hear about a child having an abusive parent, bullying classmates, and/or other terrible experiences in his/her formative years. But while an awful childhood may well explain some things, in my mind, it does not excuse them. So even though I might have great sympathy, I do not have affection. Sorry.

Posted by StillLacking.

I'm sorry to hear that, Lacking, because I invited Leon to go camping with us.

Posted by michael.

A lack of affection does not necessarily predicate a lack of civility. Besides, whose rule says one must like everyone with whom one goes camping?

Posted by StillLacking.

Here's how I see it. Leon is what he is, but he is no where near what his father was. I assume Noland's children, if they speak to him at all, are perhaps not as bad as he is either. So we'll rack one up for change and if not ending a horrendous cycle certainly curbing it. Now, Leon camping, wouldn't that be something Mike!

Posted by nicelady.

The thing about hanging out with Leon at your house is that I can go home whenever I want. Leon in my tent just might be a bit much.

Noland's sons, well, I haven't met either one, but I could tell some heart breaking stories.

Posted by mike.

Posted by Michael at October 2, 2004 09:08 AM