February 22, 2004
Red LIghts
Man in blue.
Dear Matthew,
It’s my fault. No, really, it is.
Do you remember sitting in mom’s car waiting for that two hundred and fifty pound trooper with his crewcut, and face hacked out of granite? The guy who barely fit in the passenger’s seat. And do you remember all of my helpful questions to prepare you for your driving test?
“Matt, how far from a stop sign are you legally required to stop?”
“Shuutup, you’re freaking me out!”
“Matt, how far from an intersection should you engage your turn signals?”
“Shuutup, you’re freaking me out. Don’t ask me questions you don’t have the answers to.”
“Shouldn’t you know the answers?”
“I’ll tell you how many. It’s, shuuttt the hell up, number of feet. That’s how many.”
If mom had taken you for your driver’s test, she’d have left the teasing at home, and asked sensible questions. As I should have. She would have asked you what your friends had problems with, and you certainly would have remembered that Julie, too, drove right through that tricky red light. The one without an intersection, the one thirty feet before the red light, with a very busy intersection.
Not passing that test is a blip, but what is not a blip is the respect your adult friends (you know the list, we had dinner with most of them last night) have for you. Those that love and know you best, were flabbergasted that you came home without your license. Had I claimed the earth’s magnetic poles flipped, they would have said, “Okay.” But no one could believe that you didn’t pass it. Like it or not, you got a rep, boy.
Love,
Dad
Lest it be misunderstood, by rep, your dad means -- for competence in all things, and excellence in most. Not that you blew your first test. That, too, is but a blip.
Sweet piece of writing. But for all your self-deprecation, like it or not, you got a rep, too, dad. So back down offa y'self a piece. Those that love and know you best don't always want to see you try to take every bullet...........
Posted by face in that crowd.Well, in most cases we dont want him to take the bullet, although it is funny to watch, and in many cases is his fault. Like this one. I start out all calm and serene, and then my dad starts with the questions, ones that neither of us have any idea as to the answer.
Anyway, there is always Wednesday.
They have driving tests in Massachusetts? Geez. Who would have known? And laws too? From all my driving experiences in and around Boston, I would have sworn that there were no laws. Certainly in Boston no one stops at stop signs, and it takes a double red light (has anyone ever seen one of those outside Boston?) to make drivers stop at a light. As for stopping for pedestrians? As far as I could see, they're fair game. The only driver I ever saw ticketed in Beantown was a guy who drove over the double yellow line to pass two cars waiting to turn, turned right in front of them without slowing down, sped off into heavy traffic on Memorial drive burning rubber. Which law did the cop get him for? An expired icense plate?
Posted by Michael at February 22, 2004 07:53 AM
Lest it be misunderstood, by rep, your dad means -- for competence in all things, and excellence in most. Not that you blew your first test. That, too, is but a blip.
Sweet piece of writing. But for all your self-deprecation, like it or not, you got a rep, too, dad. So back down offa y'self a piece. Those that love and know you best don't always want to see you try to take every bullet...........
Posted by: face in that crowdat February 22, 2004 08:46 AMWell, in most cases we dont want him to take the bullet, although it is funny to watch, and in many cases is his fault. Like this one. I start out all calm and serene, and then my dad starts with the questions, ones that neither of us have any idea as to the answer.
Anyway, there is always Wednesday.
They have driving tests in Massachusetts? Geez. Who would have known? And laws too? From all my driving experiences in and around Boston, I would have sworn that there were no laws. Certainly in Boston no one stops at stop signs, and it takes a double red light (has anyone ever seen one of those outside Boston?) to make drivers stop at a light. As for stopping for pedestrians? As far as I could see, they're fair game. The only driver I ever saw ticketed in Beantown was a guy who drove over the double yellow line to pass two cars waiting to turn, turned right in front of them without slowing down, sped off into heavy traffic on Memorial drive burning rubber. Which law did the cop get him for? An expired icense plate?